Villa Dilla

This week I was mostly in Phuket, which to state the obvious was nice. Even the warning about being killed for trafficking drugs was nice: “Welcome to Phuket” it read, “Offenders against drug related crime will be sentenced to the highest penalty” it was then signed off “With Best Wishes Phuket Governor” Very polite people the Thais.
We had assembled with several other drinking buddies of Elliot the foot drinker to celebrate his 30th. He managed to secure a sensational villa that meant we only needed to leave the place to play golf. We would ship the staff a couple of bucks each day and they would turn it into booze and amazing Thai food that would make your bot a little hot.
Luckily we didn’t need to go far to cool down with a pool next to the dining area, which of course meant I was obliged to show off my finely honed bombing skills, crafted over a decade of landing bum first in the Canberra Olympic pool. Managed to pull off some fine bummies, runny turnies, horsies and a couple of old school can openers.
In an unrelated bombing incident one of the guests fell down the stairs on the first night, split her head open and cracked a couple ribs before passing out cold. Monkey said he didn’t push her, but he was the only other person around and was behind her at the time. Fortunately we had a doctor in the house, unfortunately he was rocket scientist. Although he could put a great model together showing the forces of gravity and the impact to the head he suggested they perhaps should seek medical advice instead.
So the now delirious and bleeding victim was driven by a still drunk Elliot, accompanied by a non medical doctor, his Thai wife acting as interpreter and a guilty looking Monkey around the island looking for a clinic. We were getting up for breakfast, just after they had arrived back home. A long night for some and a cracking start to the holiday for others.
We might well have been off to the clinic later that afternoon as another guest went bungy jumping determined to win a bet. He maintains he wasn’t scared but after 2 false starts he made his awkward fall towards a mosquito ridden swamp. With what can only be described as a brain explosion he grabbed the rope on the bounce back up and was probably lucky to not lose an arm. It did cause a sensational bruise though but I don’t think he was sober enough to feel the pain thereafter.
After an action packed 4 days we moped on home, leaving the rest of the crew and some new comers to destroying their internal organs. If you have a spare $13k USD I can thoroughly recommend this place for a week. http://www.villagetaways.com/villa.php?vid=13&cid=8